THE BEST BEFORE DATE - 1983 - Musette & Drums by The Cocteau Twins

Early Cocteau Twins albums, before gossamer ethereal completely took hold, had a wildness to them. Emotionally they are much rougher cut gem. Some of that comes from Liz Fraser's vocals, that in this earliest incarnation, still had the residual trace of that weird vocal quirk, the guttural wailing wobble. Robin Guthrie's multi layered guitar playing could unexpectedly produce this doom ridden coruscating riffs or wail of noise that I can still find utterly heartbreaking. All of these qualities are present in this one track from their second album Head Over Heels - Musette & Drums. It is the concluding track, because after this nothing else could realistically follow it.

It opens with Guthrie's guitar chiming, alternating between the heights then the depths. Telling you to rally together, declaiming - be ready to defend. The pounding imperial conquesting of its drums driving forward. Then comes Fraser's vocals, the words all jumbled up phrases and sequences, conjuring up this cruel world blasted but not entirely loveless in its burnt and burnished horizon  Partly frail, worn thin, yet still with strength and ability to be defiant As the track progresses it becomes more anarchically intricate and dense, until by the end Guthrie's guitar wails in a keening roar, sharp as steel, startling and rising. As it ascends it becomes wilder, more intensely despairing. It screeches and flails like an animal trapped in pain. Yet still higher it goes, and just when you think it could go no further, it goes on up and up.

For me, I find the end of Musette & Drums one of the most gut wrenching pieces of music. Thirty nine years later I still find it profoundly upsetting to listen to. Struggling to rise up, to transcend, it has hope that there is a way out, something to fight and aspire for. But also a resigned fatalism, that all this effort may not in the end succeed. Its infused with this deep deeply profound melancholic despair that nonetheless still wants to fly free of itself.

That it speaks to me in this way, says a lot about my own internal psychology and emotional world, I guess. All of it packed into one short four minutes plus album track from 1983. It remains so magnificent and timeless, of no particular era, as if the Cocteau Twins came to us from entirely another realm.