Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 24, 2020

ARTICLE - The Stains of Empire

















Once upon a time we controlled a vast empire, but we do no longer, Yet in our imaginations we are still empire builders, just ones who are down on our luck. This leaves our countries collective ego permanently bruised. The more we remain in this realm of loss, grieving, we stay stuck within a resentful state of denial and anger over it. The more we behave like petulant infants, the more foolish we look in the eyes of everyone else, except to ourselves. Our constant bragging and talking up our status as 'world beaters' appears as the ridiculous charade it is. We don’t drive the world's economy anymore. Paradoxically our present standing and influence in the world, though greatly diminished, remains utterly indebted to that past and the stains of an empire.

Full extent of the British Empire















History, truthfully told, informs us that how we behaved in order to create and maintain that empire, power and influence, came at a huge human cost. There is then a debt of guilt that we constantly try to squirm out of paying off, one we defer, deny or void transacting. Our conscience as a country will never be clear until we do. We continue to avert our gaze. When will we stop our sulking and cease the constant straining to reheat the stone cold cadaver of empire? Whilst all the while newer economic forces are kicking us further into the long grass like a useless rusty old can. The world long ago lost patience with waiting for this imperious attitude to change.
















Even my humble lifestyle, many centuries later, is built on the ground that British slave traders and entrepreneurial marauders first made. The British Empire, like all empires, did not come about reasonably or peacefully, it pillaged and ravaged like any other, We raped other countries of their people, resources, culture, independence and dignity. We used lies, subterfuge, dissimulation, coercion and repressive power to get our way. We placed iron necklaces around people’s necks, we commodified and displaced them. We committed gross atrocities, created the world's first concentration camps, were the great despoilers of cultures and empires far older than our own. All of which we’ve retrospectively applied a sepia tinted veneer to, and a quintessentially English mood of refined respectability and aloof beneficence.



Though we undoubtedly all have had our own struggles, our own indignities, our own sense of wrongs being done to us via common prejudices about status, class or gender. We can always fall back upon national pride in the empire to buttress our self-esteem if we wish to. This presents us with an authenticated certificate of a god given mission. We feel somehow divinely blessed, and no matter how poor we are we can always grasp onto that particular lifebelt. Inhale its salty revivifying perfume, whenever reality knocks us down to size and puts us in our true place in the world.

I have a responsibility as an Englishman, to own my ingrained racism, to accept that it's ingrained nature will make it hard to see clearly. It resides in an unspoken sense of economic entitlement, a national and cultural superiority that arises in part from the propaganda of empire the effects of which still insidiously roll on and on. But this means our present identity as a country is fatally flawed and gives itself an entirely unearned gratuity. Resorting to playing the sentimental rhapsody of empire whenever things get a little challenging to our national self-esteem.

Yet the Empire petered out during the first half of the 20th Century, and ceased effectively to exist before I was born. It nevertheless has left a stain upon our psyche that seeps out in how we talk, think and see ourselves and others. It’s a poisonous legacy, tangible through the all pervading fatalism, our arche cynicism, our ridicule of positive developments, our persistent amnesia over our role in the slave trade, our denial of responsibility or guilt for the dark side of the empire, the defensive defiant nature of our anger, our negative views of the state of our country, all fundamental to the desire for Brexit and the need to be great again. It’s like a psychological plea for help hidden away in the lining of some very plush but closed curtains.

















At the moment we hear stronger echoes of our level of indebtedness and responsibility through the #blacklivesmatter protests. This is holding up a mirror to us, yet again. Our refusal as a country to look for too long into that mirror, to fully face the wrongs committed against our fellow humankind in the days of Empire and even through to today, leaves us all abandoned in an alienated state of mind. Always wanting to be left alone as an island, able to physically and psychologically cut ourselves off from Europe, even though we share a history of being fallen empires with most of them. Many have allowed themselves to grow beyond the stains of their empires. Yet here we are still viewing the rest of the world as if it still owes us allegiance, that the Empire can be re-kindled from the embers of what is essentially a mythology founded on lies and half-truths.

There is a pressing need for the history books on the British Empire, to be publicly  re-examined, re-thought and re-written. Our history, like some of our statues, does present and uphold unexamined many immoral things. Toppling those statues or burning those books, without self-reflection and self-examination, would do us no good whatsoever, that would let us off far too lightly. Until we embark on some essential re-examination of our past, we petrify the vision, creativity and imagination of our future, we leave the door closed to a more optimistic forward looking identity as a country.


















Britain is a mongrel nation, that prefers to think of itself as thoroughbred. We have been for millenia an island that benefited greatly from successive waves of immigrants, this is what has created who we are. It is then quite ironic that we have this strong tendency toward being small minded, insular and xenophobic. We do not fully understand how we came to be as we are, because our view of our past is deluded and holds us back. There is no longer any room for special pleading, but we try nonetheless - the British Empire was not all bad - look how much we helped them - we gave them democracy and well run institutions - we gave them our god and our reason. All delivered in a patronising form of kindness, as though you’re sending a bolshy child to bed without supper until they show some respect and are grateful.





















We were never anyone’s betters. We were just the more powerful adversary, economically, militarily so we could usually get whatever we wanted. What has been portrayed in the Boys Own Annuals as pioneering and heroic, was in actuality a colonial opportunistic grab of power and land, often for purely personal aggrandisement and gain. Such was the life of Clive of India, for instance, but he was far from alone in this sort of activity. This behaviour was often state endorsed, officially approved annexation and appropriation.





















I maintain some pride in my country, but the way it continues to behave makes that hard to hold without shame and embarrassment. Our patriotism is of the shallow sort, the one that waves a cheap plastic union jack on a stick, one that is founded on a rotten set of self-beliefs. If it reeks of hypocrisy, racism and corruption this originates in our state institutions, our establishment and its moneyed elites, but it spreads out to infect our wider culture, economy and society. Everyone recognises the smell, the stench of it, it is like a broken drain that no one wants to dig up and mend.

The stains of empire bind us to a view of the past that is actually unworthy of us. We should expect more from ourselves than this tattered old map of Britannia ruling the waves. If we could liberate ourselves from this, we might see ourselves as capable of so much more. If we could genuinely re-envision our past, we would be free to re-vision our future and take it forward in any way we wished.





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Sunday, June 14, 2020

200 WORDS ON - Statues





















Statues present a flawed view of history. The great and good portrayed unlikely to have been paragons of virtue in everything they did. To become extremely wealthy often requires the use of dodgy ethical behaviours, which are then laundered retrospectively through philanthropic gestures and charity work. 
Remember all the statues of Jimmy Saville subsequently destroyed, someone else who hid his moral turpitude behind very public charity work. Perhaps we should exercise greater restraint in whom we immortalise in stone in public spaces. If we do so at all.

Toppling statues is highly symbolic. An expression of disdain, that provocatively edits what can be publicly lauded. Removal is one way to correct the misrepresentations of our history. We can also re-label, providing a greater breadth of information about who someone was. The scope of our history teaching can be broadened. Statues are just dumb monuments otherwise.

Westminster Abbey, a supposedly sacred building, now resembles a storage unit filled with herds of plinths and carved marble statuary. Statues should enhance a space, but there they make it cluttered. Parks are lined with commemorative bronzes to people, either no longer worthy of respect, or mostly forgotten. Historically and aesthetically statues are piss-poor representatives





  

Sunday, April 07, 2019

DEMOCRATIC DEMENTIA ~ The Early Symptoms

The most common early symptoms of democratic dementia are:

Memory loss
Declining memory, especially short-term memory, is the most common early symptom of democratic dementia. People with ordinary forgetfulness can still remember other facts associated with the thing they have forgotten. For example, they may briefly forget their next-door neighbour's name but they still know the person they are talking to is their next-door neighbour. A person with democratic dementia will not only forget their neighbour's name but also the context.

Difficulty performing familiar tasks
People with democratic dementia often find it hard to complete everyday tasks that are so familiar we usually do not think about how to do them. A person with democratic dementia may not know in what order to put clothes on or the steps for preparing a meal.

Problems with language
Occasionally everyone has trouble finding the right word but a person with democratic dementia often forgets simple words or substitutes unusual words, making speech or writing hard to understand.

Disorientation to time and place
We sometimes forget the day of the week or where we are going but people with democratic dementia can become lost in familiar places such as the road they live in, forget where they are or how they got there, and not know how to get back home. A person with democratic dementia may also confuse night and day.

Poor or decreased judgement
People with democratic dementia may dress inappropriately, wearing several layers of clothes on a warm day or very few on a cold day.

Problems with keeping track of things
A person with democratic dementia may find it difficult to follow a conversation or keep up with paying their bills.

Misplacing things
Anyone can temporarily misplace his or her wallet or keys. A person with democratic dementia may put things in unusual places such as an iron in the fridge or a wristwatch in the sugar bowl.

Changes in mood or behaviour
Everyone can become sad or moody from time to time. A person with democratic dementia may become unusually emotional and experience rapid mood swings for no apparent reason. Alternatively a person with democratic dementia may show less emotion than was usual previously.

Changes in personality
A person with democratic dementia may seem different from his or her usual self in ways that are difficult to pinpoint. A person may become suspicious, irritable, depressed, apathetic or anxious and agitated especially in situations where memory problems are causing difficulties.

Loss of initiative
At times everyone can become tired of housework, business activities, or social obligations. However a person with democratic dementia may become very passive, sitting in front of the television for hours, sleeping more than usual, or appear to lose interest in hobbies.


If you are experiencing any of these symptoms or are concerned about a friend or relative, visit your doctor and discuss your concerns.

* Source https://www.alz.co.uk/info/early-symptoms  Alzheimer's Disease International ~ with one minor editorial  adjustment.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

RANT - N.O.M - Anti-Gay Marriage.

I often feel as though I've nothing particularly against Christianity, and I'm reluctant to rub excrement in its face. But seeing adverts like this make it difficult to restrain ones bile.



The whole gay threat to marriage,has never made much sense. This advert, however, substantially shifts the territory of the argument to a 'your lifestyle is impinging on mine' territory. In a curious way this marks a victory for the 'gay community.' The balance has shifted, away from a conventional marriage lifestyle being openly used to oppress gay lifestyles, to one that is more a level playing field. That's what they're complaining about in this advert - we're not getting our own way anymore - we feel the oppression of you. I doubt whether it really is oppression, but more that they're being asked to be tolerant, which they might find a tad difficult. But having to share this field is obviously too close for comfort for some. As a gay man this advert makes uneasy viewing, it seems all too sane,reasonable and normal. Ordinary 'decent' folks will be alarmed! Anyway, comic help is at hand. Theres' a whole raft of parodies on You Tube, taking the Michael(its easy to do)to various degrees of success. This is one of the best.



A giant gay repellent umbrella sounds....colourful?

Saturday, February 14, 2009

RANT - I Predict.....the end of.......














In the current recessionary climate, banks, monetary institutions and all manner of economic pundits, are falling over themselves to predict the depths of destitution to which it will drag our countries industry and international business. As they singularly failed to predict the origins and speed of its arrival, why we should pay a blind bit of notice to any of their pronouncements about its extent and expected time of departure, beggars belief. Each appears now to be vying for a future 'I was right' prize, the winner of which will see them rise to the top of the economic astrology charts, sell advice books to redundant 'short sellers,' become a much sought after business guru, and be fated as an oracle for the shareholders of 'Middle England'. Until, of course, they inevitable fail to spot the next economic downturn, and all kudos disappears rapidly down a cavernous plughole. It reached a height of ludicrousness this week when some burk (it may have been plural) announced this recession would mean 'the end of finance'. Oh, really!!! tell me another one do.

Competing with the economists for this 'Enlightened' status, are the cultural trend setters, out to be first to spot what the credit crunch will mean 'the end of'. People stop doing a lot of things in a recession, because they can't afford them, this doesn't mean that when better times return they've learnt their lesson and will never touch a silver plated 'blackberry', or a white buckskin sofa, ever ever again. I would like to make my own contribution to this parlour guessing game with a few modest predictions of my own.

I think the current recession will mean....

the end of..... paper
- facebook will continue to increase phenomenally in popularity. What social conversation there is, will be conducted in short twelve word sentences, with no complicated syllables allowed. Grunts, coughs and 'cool,' will now count as penetrative social comment, and will be treated as a dehydrated sound bite. Anyone habitually more verbose than that, will risk being ostracised as suffering from acute 'social diarrhea.' Newspapers will as a consequence become referred to in street slang as 'arsebooks.'

the end of...water beds
-water will be far too expensive, even to drink, we become a nation of meths drinkers - the slogan - 'I could throttle a bottle' - catches on.

the end of.... Tracey
Emin - oh, how I wish this could be true.

the end of.... testicular jock straps -
as finances get tight, men will want everything else to hang loose, rather than have their manhood trussed up like a turkey. It will bring a whole new meaning to the word 'austerity' i.e - to visibly hang your bollocks out.

the end of.... smiley badges,T shirts, flags, balls etc -
these will just get soooo annoying, when they are used as part of a government backed 'cheer up Britain' campaign - with the catch phrases 'Its not that bad, really' and 'why worry Wally?' being heavily satirised.

the end of.... living in houses with tiled roofs -
green tarpaulin slung casually over scaffolding and roof rafters to flap wildly in a gale, will make a huge come back as more new houses are left unfinished, and the owners of older houses cannot afford to complete repairing them.

the end of.... handbags - car use will decline, so - as you need a rugged four by four to transport your leather arm candy in - shopping trolleys will make a spectacular return. In the Karl Lagerfeld designed advert, Posh is seen dragging a black and silver bondage strapped trolley, like a dead designer punk, whose snow white mohican fringe aesthetically sweeps the pavement behind her. Women learn from this to treat the litter strewn, retail desert of our UK high streets, as just another very long catwalk / photo opportunity, and to blithely step over all on-coming beggars. 'They're a lot more use than my husband,' Posh wryly winks to camera. This remark does itself becomes a matter for conjecture, as its unclear whether she was referring to the shopping trolley, or the street tramps.

There, I'm sure at least one of those will prove themselves an outright winner.


My predictive acumen, once verified by the passage of time, will open up a whole new career path for me. Not only getting me a regular column in the Guardian weekend magazine, but numerous appearances on radio and TV quiz shows, where I'll make sweeping generalisations at the drop of a hat, be grossly rude about every minority social and disability group, exciting controversy on Radio 4 with my cavalier use of 'ironic offensiveness.' I'll become fluently adept at just opening my mouth and saying the first thing that comes into it, beginning or ending each sentence with an obligatory 'fuck, fucker or fucking', occasionally scattering the odd'twat', 'cunt,' or 'arsehole' around as a further verbal condiment. I'll have them rolling off their sofas in Surrey in outrage, before you can say Jimmy Carr was cloned from the DNA of Bernard Manning's sweat.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

RANT - GIVE US A SIGN MASTER !

It wasn’t until I visited Norway last year that I began to notice the English fetish for directional signs. Oslo, in comparison to even a quiet smokey English hamlet, is minimally sign posted. Presumable in a country the physical size of Norway, with a combined population hard pushed to exceed a modest sized metropolitan city in England, getting lost there would theoretically be much easier. Just walk out into any Norwegian Wood and be discovered decades later frozen to a pine tree. Little realising you were a mere hundred miles from a local supermarket or Viking Theme Park.

In this information age of Google and Sat Nav , it’s hardly beyond the ken of most English people to know where they are going and how to get there. Yet still we hear complaints about the wrong sort of signs, not enough signs, or worse still signs in the wrong places. I rarely hear anyone saying there are far too many signs. Just take a look at the way they clutter up our street corners.

In Cambridge, because it is a heritage site, heavily traffic congested and a cyclists paradise, we are festooned with the dratted things. Covered with Blue Signs, Green Signs, Brown Signs, White Signs, Black with Gold Letter Signs. Speed Signs, Warning Signs, Informing Signs, Advertising Signs, Place Signs, Floodlit Signs, Flashing Signs, etc etc. Centuries ago a lonely wayfarer toddling along a cobbled road to Cambridge would look out for a milestone. Usually they simply told you how far you were from London and how far away the nearest town was. These days signposts are getting to resemble models of a double helix, which for Cambridge would be very apt.

So what is going on here? Our every directional need is met. It’s very hard to get lost for very long in England. Within minutes you’re bound to find a sign for a B&B, its name and proximity. They do all but tell you the tariff, how long they’ve been in business and whether they’re gay friendly. Perhaps its because English people are hopelessly parochial. They travel in confidence around their own homes and gardens. They haven’t a clue about anything beyond their immediate road, let alone village, town or country. There is no point in asking for directions, you have to rely on signs.

Signs do ,however, have a habit of running out, just when you most need them. I was once in Thetford looking for the site of the priory ruins. There was a sign in the town centre which I followed to where there was another sign. Then came a fork in the road where there was no sign. Suddenly I was thrown upon trusting my instincts. In this instance they were entirely wrong. I wandered around cyclically for sometime, getting tantalising glimpses of my quarry through bushes, but never getting close to it. When I finally found the entrance it was obvious why the sign makers had given up. It was getting far too complicated, involving subways under roads. More signs would have just confused things even more.

David has reminded me of a classic example of pointless signs. The ones that say ‘To the North’, I guess that’s so Southerners are forewarned. Quite when the South becomes the Midlands, or the Midlands the North is a debatable question. What is it we are North of? Civilisation? The English Channel? The Queen?

As a country we take pride in our nonconformity, which appears to be in direct contradiction to our actual behaviour. We complain about red tape and unnecessary restrictions on our liberty and rebel in pitifully minor ways. We never want to take off and get lost in a wilderness ourselves. We sit in our homely armchairs, wearing our carpet slippers and watch vicariously someone else’s adventure on cable TV.