We all tend to view time as something external to us that flies or passes us by, that there is either too much or not enough of. It divides up our life experience and memories into what is past, present or for the future. We tend to conceive of time as proceeding in this sequential way as our clock dials go from 1 to 24, so our day to day experiences fall like dominoes from dawn to dusk, A to B, life to death.
Time re-frames our life story, turning individual experiences and events into a self propelled narrative along a path that we visualise ourselves as having directed. Even spiritual practice can be turned into another form of this self-improving journey, except this one ends up with the state of Enlightenment. Most of the time this causes no problems. There are, after all, countless Buddhist lists that appear to encourage us to present the purpose of Buddhist practice to be a bit like climbing a ladder or a spiral staircase.
This implies that Enlightenment is not attainable in this present moment, but is at a point far away that we are nowhere near reaching right now. But when that point is reached, when realisation does occur, the place where that will happen will be there, right then, in that future present moment. The sequential stages of progress may help prepare us but only so far. Whether our view is sequential or immediate, the way we conceive of and use the present moment is extremely important, if we are ever to 'see things as they really are.'
It is an overused cliche to talk of living in the present moment. We rarely ask what and where that present moment is in our experience? Though we are aware that the present moment exists, it does so consciously only in retrospect, we analyse and comment on what has happened there, after it has happened. We say to ourselves 'Oh that was interesting' as our self-awareness kicks in subsequent to the event. When the present moment is actually happening it is just being lived, not cross-examined and probed for significance or meaning.
We cannot self-consciously make ourselves 'present' within the present moment. It's not a place where self analysis can exist alongside it, because we are so deeply embroiled as an integral part of the moment that has arisen. According to Dogen in his Shobogenzo essay Uji, our sense of being and our sense of time are one indivisible dynamic event occurring in each presenting moment. Being-Time is not a duality, it is 'not two', its like a coin without two sides, no heads, no tails, but valuable.
If only the present moment of 'being time' can be experienced then each moment contains within it everything that has ever happened, not just to ourselves but to everyone and everything that ever existed. In every singular moment we experience the impermanent nature of the phenomena happening immediately in our present life, whilst also being involved in the endless, ever shifting network of interconnected phenomena that encompasses us on a world or cosmic level, this is where 'each moment is the entire universe', as Dahnin Katagiri puts it. 'Being-time' though experienced as particular to us, is simultaneously intimate with and inclusive of everything in every time frame.
This idea of being-time is linked philosophically with 'buddha nature' though the latter as a concept is a contentious one. That we can already be something, but not be aware of it, is inherently problematic. Dogen was not the first Buddhist to point out that this appeared to undermine the necessity for spiritual practice altogether. In the Shobogenzo chapter on Uji*** he proposes his own resolution to heal the apparent disjuncture between practice and realisation that the concept of 'buddha nature' opens up. Practice-realisation, like being-time, does not run along some imagined parallel linear trajectories, but are one singular simultaneous activity in the presenting moment. All these terms become intertwined in where they take place - the present moment.
If you hold too literally to the view that spiritual progress happens sequentially in an elevating hierarchy of states, then the concept of practice-realisation will be difficult to see the sense of. Even if one puts trust in the idea of 'buddha nature', realisation will often be impeded by subtle sub-conscious views of realisation that are sequential or self-focused in nature. Practice-realisation is not like bringing hot water, green tea leaves and a teapot together in order to make a truly fabulous cup of tea.
Without taking it too literally, it could be said that - realisation prompts practice and practice prompts realisation. Relatively speaking, we experience practice as either 'touching' or 'not touching' full realisation, but if we were to speak from a more absolute position, practice is never in nor out of touch with realisation. At some point our words, images, concepts are always in danger of failing or implying a duality that will obscure fuller comprehension, but we have to keep trying. Practice, because its not separate from it, is not the means to achieve realisation, but resembles a constant emanation like the beams cast from a lighthouse, sometimes intermittent, sometimes steady.
Realisation doesn't exist without practice and practice doesn't exist without realisation. After all the Buddha continued practicing meditation regularly even after his own 'awakening', if 'awakening' had been the breakthrough conclusion that would not have been necessary. Realisation is always there in the moment of practice, even though most of the time we are blind to it.
Zazen meditation practice is unique in having no purpose, no technique, no formal structure to master, nothing to be done or nothing to be gained. This is a practice that encourages no desire to 'touch' or 'not touch' full realisation, and cannot be forced to go anywhere without that willfulness becoming self-sabotaging. You sit present to whatever is there, letting go of any mental entanglement that arises and returning to the presenting moment. Zazen practice places you in a space where you rehearse how to 'just be a being' . At some point this 'practice - leads to - an experience of being-time in the present moment' and ' an experience of being-time in the present moment - leads to realisation' in one dynamic synchronous event.
That's why learning how to be in the present moment, whether on or off the cushion, in everyday life, at work or play, is considered so important.
*** My recent background reading of Uji has informed most of this article. This is reviewed in a post that will follow this article.
PS
Within the limitations and predispositions of my own intellect, writing ability and comprehension, I've attempted to present the basic thrust of Dogen's ideas concerning the present moment in simple, clear language. Subtle nuances and fine details have inevitability been left out. All our conceptions when we are on the wrong side of Awakening will be likewise wrong. Even the Buddha was initially unsure he could communicate his Enlightenment experience effectively. All teachings are the proverbial fingers pointing at the moon, they are only indicate the general direction we should travel in, they are not the Moon.
Insight and understanding are, as ever, a work in progress.
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